Coming to terms with suicide loss
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Pune, Maharashtra: According to an article published in the Indian Journal Of Psychiatry in 2007, more than one hundred thousand lives are lost every year to suicide.
In the last two decades, the suicide rate has increased from 7.9% to 10.3% per hundred thousand. Moreover, in India, as many as 37.8% of suicides are committed by those below 30 years of age. “These figures are an indication of the grim situation that exists today. The increasing level of stress and the inability by many youngsters to cope with the competitive needs of the world is what leads them to commit suicide,” says Arnavaz Damania, founder of Connecting, a trust started in Pune in 2005 for suicide prevention. Now, Connecting has also started reaching out to the ‘survivors of suicide loss’. Surmounting the shock The results have been positive. Take the case of Maya Deshpande, a single parent whose 15-year old daughter committed suicide six months ago. She was suffering from a form of neuro-biological imbalance which was diagnosed very late. Maya first attributed certain changes in her behaviour to the fact that she was an adolescent and her priorities were changing by way of studies and interests. She said that she got panicky when she discovered that her daughter had started losing interest in everything. She had stopped speaking to her friends and made statements like ‘nobody cares’ or ‘I wish I were dead’. “But even then I never thought that she would actually take her own life,” she narrates, unable as yet to surmount the shock. In fact, had it not been for her 12-year old son, Maya said that she would have committed suicide too. It was while she was dealing with this shattering event in her life that Maya heard about the trust. “A couple of meetings I attended convinced me that it would help me to face life all over again,” she states. “The support that we have started is a forum for survivors to share their experiences in a supportive environment where they are not judged. Each group has six to eight members and meet weekly,” informs Sandy Andrade, a volunteer working with the trust. Meanwhile, the trust, with 35 members, continues to deal with people who are prone to committing suicide. “We have a team of trained psychologists who conduct workshops in counselling. We also use art therapy, self-healing, etc. One of our focus areas is to deal with child sexual abuse,” states Damania. Connecting has to its credit hundreds of cases in which a suicidal person has been pulled out of his or her state of mental depression. ‘Drifting without an anchor’ Santosh K, currently training to be a chef, is one such youngster who was able to extricate himself out of his obsession with death. It happened primarily because he just could not decide on a career option. While all his friends had graduated and obtained jobs, he was still floundering, moving from one course to another with no clear focus. He then took to drinking and drugs, as he was living away from any parental pressure. “This affected my thinking and I found myself drifting without an anchor. There seemed to be no purpose in living and I started toying with the idea of committing suicide. Fortunately, a friend recommended me to the group called Connecting and over a period of time I realised that I was interested in cooking. I then decided to follow my heart. Things are certainly looking up now,” he says. Elaborating on why suicidal tendencies are on the rise, Dr Ulhas Luktuke, a psychiatrist associated with the trust, says that it’s mainly because the human touch is on the wane in the rapidly evolving consumerist society. Today teenagers have to deal with adults who are equally under stress and have no time to share emotions and feelings. Gradually, there comes a divide which leads to isolation. The youth feel it more especially while going through traumatic situations such as academic failure or failed romances. Those who are very sensitive ultimately take the fatal approach, he says. Meanwhile, 15 self support groups in Pune have got together for the greater good of society. This happened during a small announcement made at the foundation day of the Schizophrenia Awareness Association over a month ago. With an initiative taken by professionals such as Dr Ulhas Luktuke, Maya Tulpule, Yashoda Wakankar, Chitra Khare and Prafulla Mohite, there is now an umbrella organisation that will oversee the work of support groups for HIV/AIDS, epilepsy, schizophrenia, depression, alcoholism, cancer and diabetes, among others. “People can now approach our nodal office and we will guide them to the specific support group. This will help make things easier and improve the networking,” feels Mohite, who is the coordinator of Sahchari, a group for the wives of addicts. It’s a move that support groups in other cities may do well to emulate. |
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